Il Ham Mai Hum

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

It's even worse than square one.
Just as how i predicted.
lalala.

It's always the same words, phrases and sentences.
Time and again, time after time.
I CALL FOR A SCRIPT RE-WRITE!
Anyone? Anyone?
It's even worse than a bloody broken record.
Cos, not only is it boring, it's heart breaking.
Tralalala.

I have this friend of mine.
Pig.
I would like you to know.
That you're the only un-halal thing in this world that i can't live without.
Dissect my words, you know me best.

And for you, yes you, i hope you get some good rest.

...

ilham26 @ 11:24 pm
Crawls around your room
------------

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Oh Book of God Almighty.
Oh one who's The Light and The Pious and The Straight.

I miss reading you.
I miss you, oh so much.

The sounds of your words, phrases, sentences.
The sound of your voice, your laughter, you.

The flow, the swift abruptness, the pauses.
Your eyes, your personality, you.

As it all comes together.
Oh i wish we could be together.

Oh if only i could understand.
Oh if only you would understand.

It would mean so much if i did.
It would mean so much if you did.

But i do know it's possible.
Though right now, it seems so impossible.

Time, these things take time.
I guess it would take a really really really long time.

But, if God wills.
Oh, if God wills.

And God is the best of poets.
And God has written all our fates.

Oh Book, I do miss reading you.
Oh The Light, The Pious Lady, I do miss you oh so much.

And only, I know.
If only you knew...

I saw what you wrote.
Yes you are right.
You are so so right.
Spot on, bulls eye, right on target.
I'm sorry. It's my fault.
Though, could you blame someone for falling,
for someone who's so beautiful, so humble and so pious.
I shouldn't have acted the way i did.
Well does this mean that it ends?
Because it so hard to see, reconciliation.
In our current, situation.
If only you didn't love him as much.
No, no, of me, that was so selfish.

This has been a horrible day =(.

ilham26 @ 10:05 pm
Crawls around your room
------------

Monday, October 27, 2008

Aiya whats with all the emo for the past 2 days huh?
Maybe thats what being single for a long time does to you.
Oh well.
I'll go with the flow then.

After logging into friendster (i know, friendster got gay but its the most userfriendly thing nowdays), i came to realise that ive not been paying much attention to my close friends.
Lamer, Sotonghead, Bila-larut malam, soupfeet, jesus, jem, Postduex, homeclub girls and everyone else (sorry if ive forgotten you).

I REALLY MISS ALL OF YOU YOU KNOW.
SCHOOL & DRAMA has really taken up so much of my time =(.
I miss just hanging out at starbucks (though now no more free drinks and discounts).
I miss watching bands play at scape or homeclub or anywhere else.
I miss shishaing and eating shawarma and laughing at how horny the guy from mosi cafe can be.
I miss flicking lamer's arm and watch her squeal cos she think she's fat but she's not.
I miss telling sotong that she's and idiot to think she's fat cos she's so skinny.
I miss bk and shah alam trips and drinking teh tarik (sorry im not teh peng fan).

I miss the bimboness of the homeclub girls (esp erny).
But i really miss the company of my closest outside friends.
Its my fault for not MAKING TIME to hang out with all of youus.
I PROMISE TO BE FREE-ER OKAY!!!
=D

ilham26 @ 12:16 pm
Crawls around your room
------------

Sunday, October 26, 2008

I feel sick to my stomach whenever i read about your...
Not much about you feeling...
More of about me being...

I am torn between feeling as if im a friend or a longing, see.
Cos i really do enjoy your company.
but eventually,
i do ask myself time and again,
what are we?

I don't wanna say it out.
Loud.
For fear for the worst.
For the worst does bring fear.
For the worst does bring disappoinment and despair.
But how am i able to keep this fair?
If things would not be laid bare?

If you're curious please do ask.
Maybe we can come to a consensus.
And let this pass?
And maybe i can help you forget the past.
Am i going too fast?

Best case scenario, that would be.
May be better for you, even better for me.
Decisions really up to you see.
And i still do feel very lonely....=(

On a brighter note, I just reached home from JARANRARA with MAKEUP/ALUMNIS PEEPS.
Oh how i miss all of them kecorables.
Just returned from the RELEASE OF THE CENTURY HAHA.
Seriously, aneroxic, bullimic sufferes who are seeking a cure should drop all that psychological
bullcrap and just join any willing Malay family/group during hari raya. HAHA.
So much talking cocking, gossiping, eating, drinking, sleeping, relaxing (not much green packeting though).
It was great and im real glad cos its the only 'friends' raya outing that i have this year.
Or rather, the only ACTUAL raya outing that ive had this year haha.
Pics will be uploaded as soon (or late) as i get them pics okay =).

And last night, i experienced an experience that i would never want to experience ever again...O_O. no joke.

ilham26 @ 2:07 am
Crawls around your room
------------

Friday, October 24, 2008

A pretty much assumed to be boring day turned out to be rather fun.

but first i haveta apologise to VERLYNN (insert chinese name here) FOR MISSING YOUR PARTY!! =( hope all who attended had fun huh. and your JUJU was a real gentleman for ferrying you around.

Met up with (first two nicknames must be kept secret) / / QUEENIRITATING/GIRL WHO KEPT COMPLAINING THE WHOLE TIME WE WERE OUT PFFT.

Okay la it was my fault for being late.
And my fault for missing the bus.
And my fault for insisting that we walked the long way to the RC.
AND MY FAULT FOR WHOPPING YOUR SAD SORRY ASS IN POOL =DD.

Still still it was super great fun (and super great GOODSTRESS) to have gone out with you again.
And i promise you a dinner since i couldnt breakfast with you okay =).

After that i met up straight with SURE-YEAH/GREEN RECYCLING FROG/THREE BULAN
who is so not totally fat and IMO have gotten so much cuter LOLOLOLOL. (CHEEK PINCHING TIME). Ate kebab at simpang bedok and walked thru hseng hsiong as though we're a newly wed couple shopping for household items.

Best qoute:
S: You, you, you nak i belikan tu (pointing at pork section). Dulu I pena rase, sedap tau.
Me: Boleh tapi lepas kite buat anak kay you.
S: DISGUST FACE LOLOL.
HAHAHA we were like a couple of retards la in that poor place haha.

I guess we're both somewhat in the same situation aka lacking in the opposite other's love if you get what i mean.

Okay so tmr is zee runthrough and jaranrara. =)

Muka confident LOL

Trying to be as straight as the pool cue (stick)

MUKA TEMPEK KANCIONG SPIDER WHEN LOSING LOL

Thats Three Bulan for you.

Fry wavin, fun chillin.

HAHA BURGER FACE!

Okay do stare at this picture for a few seconds.

Now compare it to this. HAHA SAME RIGHT!

Erm nope not good.

A lil better

Sadly, the best couple pic LOL.

CHOOOOO KYUUUTEEEEE

Three Bulan's Three Bulan face. HAHA

Fun fun fun!

ilham26 @ 11:51 pm
Crawls around your room
------------

Thursday, October 23, 2008

1537461461576
The only way to understand...

Why do i always give myself unrealistic hope?
Never seemed to make do with what is presented to me.
Yes maybe I am fickle I guess.
But maybe, because of this, I'd always end up the loser?
Funny how people fall for others, but when things go bad,
they'd be saying that it's for the final time.
The risk taking and all that jazz.
What about the ones who are much more privillaged?
Will it always be like that?
Are we really kidding ourselves?
Why is it so hard?
I feel as ive im always to disappointment.
So maybe it's time to get a life.

I feel lonely...

ilham26 @ 9:48 am
Crawls around your room
------------

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

So many have complained that i've neither posted nor printed umrah pics.
Reasons behind not posting, i haven't really got the time and posting pictures is a real painstaking process to do on blogger. (im not much of a flickr or what shit posting website kinda person. flckr...fckr. HAHA.)

AND YES I SO SHOULD CONCENTRATE IN CLASS BUT WE'RE TALKING ABOUT INFOCOMM SECURITY. i mean....HOW FUN IS INFOCOMM SECURITY. SO FUN RIGHT. HELLZ YEAH BITCHEZ!

So i've decided that id makes posts of different sets of pictures.
FIRST! NUMERO UNO. NOMBOR SATU. WAHID!
would be THEM LULZ WORTHY pics.

Next edition would be the best ones okay =).

(im so gonna get it cos of this. haha)

Skeleton like!

MUKA STEP CUTE.

Thinking monkey HAHA

Noseway to heaven. HAHA

Muka tempek. HAHA

Super ngorokz.

HAHHA WHATTAF CONSTIPATED FACE!

Abang body HAHA!

BOTTOM RIGHT LOLZ

ehehehe cheeky boy.

Rauf : Like...whateverr

Hmm i guess someone's gotto go take their wuduk again.

Are you thinking what im thinking B1?
I think i am B2.
=)

Chin no evil.

ERM. NO IDEA....

Awww shucks.

Lepak benar nampak.

HAHAHHAHA CIK NUR LAPAR PE JOY!?

HAHAHA HISYAM LAPAR PE JOY.

Okay okay im sorry for making fun of you. Don't you start sulking now.

Hmm jangan masuk campur haaa.

SNORLAX.

LOOK AT RAUF (the guy). HAHAHA

EXTREME LEFT LOL WHATTAF.

HMM WHAT WILL I BUY WHEN I GET BACK??? (inside joke)

Guy on the left LOL

HAHA SLUMBER(not selambe okay i know) FACE

HAHAHAHHAHA CLASSIC

BUAHAHAHHA SHITTTT

OMG OMG HAAAAAAAAHAHAHA

Lol typical of Abg June.

OMG SALEHA! YOUR BEST EVER SHOT =DDD

She looks like ultraman's head. HEHEH

Moley moley moley

Holy stress!

hehehe chekky

OI SLEEPING WHEN KHUTBAH

THIS PIC IS NOT FUNNY BUT HE'S SO CUTE OMGAHHHH I LOVE CHILDREN! (in a totally non-paedophilic way mind you sick bastards)

MUKA TEMPEK THE SEQUEL

Sneaky boy

HAHAHAAA

Hmm so now we know who stole the cookies from the cookie jar..

LAPAR PE JOY!?? HAHA

lulz

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Hmm so i went out with so and so and so and so and so. haha.
Could be said that it was our 2nd proper outing. Filled with laughs, frowns, sighs, sulking and a whole lot of GOOD STRESS.
Went to watch Big Stan. She being a tudunger, was obviously not her idea to watch that type of movie.
And i've never seen someone who initially forgot that she was 18 and then got so excited after that that she was going to watch an M-18 movie and started talking about buying her own ciggs and going to a porn shop (not that she smokes and the porn shop reference was for me -____-).
Still, Big Stan was more or less porn for her and nothing for me. HAHA.
I really really enjoyed the outing though. Can't really remember a better outing with someone i just knew. And there wasn't any acting or being a different person as both of us has seen each other's worse during our pilgrimmage to Mecca. So it an all natural, organic and exciting outing.

Wouldn't really bore you with the details of it. And im not one to express my sincerest feelings about some trip or something through here as it's only for the people concerend. but just enjoy the pictures =).

And yes. I think she's the only girl that i know that would run from lido to masjid alfalah(to pray) and back in less than 15 mins just to catch a 710pm movie and not complain =). ( though you complained about ten thousand other things -____-. HEHE KIDDIN)

And yes the outing was as refreshing as her tudung. LOL